In the beginning love is fun, it’s new, and every moment is an adventure. It brings butterflies to the stomach when the phone rings and the anticipation of when you’ll see each other again is daunting. It’s being inseparable and feeling every bit of the honeymoon phase. It’s learning the language of the soul of your person of interest and seeing a life with them in it. It feels good, insatiable and addicting.
Years pass and life with your love is familiar. It’s comfortable. It’s probably gotten a little more routine and for some, this is when the spark fades. You can’t imagine life without this person but the adventure has been replaced with the mundane nuances and necessities of life. If you have a family together, the time you spend together is shared with the children and often that takes precedence over time spent together as a couple. And you’re generally in the phase of your life where working hard and hustling is what it takes to live. This is where resentment and frustration often breed, shared responsibility yet no time for the adult connection that you both need and crave. This is is the stage where most lose communication because it feels like pointing fingers and blame when issues surface, if not just silence and repressed emotions. Both parties just need to be heard, appreciated and loved without guilt. This is the hardest relationship phase because it takes real work, responsibility, and sacrifice when love isn't simply enough. You must grow individually and collectively.
If you make it past that stage your communication strengthens, the bond you share is unbreakable, and challenges are easier to conquer because you know you’re not alone and you’ve been through the trenches together. You’ve seen the good, the bad, and the ugly and your soul recognizes there’s nothing or no one worth risking what you have for. It doesn’t mean that you’re in the clear and life is rainbows and butterflies because that’s simply never the reality BUT it does mean that when problems arise they’re worked through jointly with grace and perseverance.
Love is vulnerable, it’s putting your trust, your heart and your life in someone else’s hands. It’s handling the heart and life of your love with the utmost respect and care. It’s not perfection and it’s often messy. It’s recognizing that you can (wholly) do life alone but you choose to acknowledge that life is sweeter and paints a full picture when you have found your soulmate.
Soulmate: individually we are each half of a whole and the healing and completion of our half is actually our wholeness; it is our duty to heal every part of ourselves first as we are the only ones that can. But when combined with our other half, our soul recognizes a oneness, a balance, and a love like no other. When the 2 halves are reunited the soul is complete and a kind of magic engulfs the individuals. The soul knows no gender only the love and longing of its other half. The oneness doesn’t break because of outside sources, it strengthens and shields itself. The physical bonding of the soulmate is other worldly and out of body.
I am eternally grateful for a partner that loves me when I’m unlovable. A partner that is the literal embodiment of love, sacrifice, strength, and courage. The comedic relief to my analytical seriousness. The calm to my crazy. The balance in every aspect of my life. My soulmate!